1 (2000 lb.) elephant, cleaned & cut
in serving pieces
1 sm. rabbit seasoned to taste

After elephant is cleaned, add seasonings. Cook in a very large pot outdoors. Cook elephant for 4-5 days or until tender. Invite all the Wire Shop employees; if everyone shows up, add cut up rabbit but only as a last resort, because most people don't like "hare" in their stew. Management Once there was an elephant, Who tried to use the telephant. No! No! I mean elephone Who tried to use the telephone. Howe'er it was, he got his trunk entangled in the telephunk; The more he tried to get it free, The louder buzzed the telephee.

1 (21 lb.) live Maine lobster
4 strips bacon, fine dice
1/2 med. onion, fine dice
1/4 med. green pepper, fine dice
1/4 med. red pepper, fine dice
1/4 med. yellow pepper, fine dice
1/4 sm. jalapeno pepper, fine dice
1/2 stalk celery, fine dice
1/2 med. carrot, fine dice
1/2 c. diced green chilies, canned
1/4 lb. unsalted butter
1/2 c. all purpose flour
6 c. lobster stock or 1 tbsp. lobster
base and 6 c. water
1 tbsp. tomato paste
1 c. corn, cut off the cob
1 c. cream style corn
1 sm. smoked hamhock
2 med. baking potatoes, peeled and
cut into 1 inch square dice
1 bunch cilantro, fine chop
2 stalks green onions, fine bias cut
2 c. heavy whipping cream
1 tsp. Lenard's southwestern
seasoning blend
1/2 lemon juice
Salt and ground black pepper, to taste

Steam lobster 17 minutes, let cool and remove from shell. Save shells to make lobster stock if desired. Saute bacon until crispy in sauce or small stock pot. Add: onions; green, red, yellow and jalapeno peppers; celery and carrots, cook until soft. Add: tomato paste and green chilies. Add: lobster base, if that is your choice over stock. Cook 3 mintues stirring constantly over medium heat. Add: 1/2 of the unsalted butter and cook until melted. Add: flour and cook 3 more minutes. Roast corn kernals in an oven on a baking sheet or other flat pan until slightly browned and add to chowder. Add: cream style corn; southwestern seasoning and smoked hamhocks. Add: stock or water, if using base. Cook for 1/2 hour keeping at a slow boil, stirring constantly. Add: potatoes and cook for another 15 minutes. If too thick add more stock or water to desired consistency. Add: green onions; cilantro and lemon juice. Slowly Whisk in cream and the remaining butter until melted. Season with salt and black pepper to taste. Serves 12 people. The Phoenician

3 oz. bacon fat
1 oz. olive oil
2 lb. onion, cut into thin strips
2 oz. marsala wine
1 gal. chicken stock
1/2 gal. beef stock
1 tsp. each thyme, basil, oregano

Saute onion in fat and oil. Add wine and cook approximately 5 minutes, until onion is soft. Add all other ingredients. Simmer for 20 minutes. Skim fat from soup. Serve with croutons and grated Romano cheese. Merchant's Club Nashville, Tennessee

4 lbs. beef round steak, cut in 1 inch
cubes
4 c. sliced carrots
2 c. sliced celery
4 med. onions, sliced
2 (5 oz.) cans water chestnuts,
drained and sliced
2 (6 oz.) cans sliced mushrooms,
drained
1/4 c. plus 2 tbsp. flour
2 tbsp. sugar
2 tbsp. salt
2 (16 oz.) cans tomatoes
2 c. Burgundy

In roasting pan or Dutch oven mix meat, carrots, celery, onions, water chestnuts and mushrooms. Mix flour, sugar and salt, then add to meat mixture. Stir in tomatoes and Burgundy. Cover and bake 4 hours.

2 tbsp. butter
1 (10 3/4 oz.) can cream of mushroom
or cream of celery soup
1 (10 oz.) box frozen mixed vegetables
1 lb. Kielbasa sausage or turkey
Kielbasa
Milk
White rice

In a small saucepan, simmer the mixed vegetables until done. While they are cooking, melt 2 tablespoons of butter in a deep fry pan. Slice the Kielbasa and then quarter each of the slices so there are four bite size pieces. Brown the Kielbasa in the butter. Then add the can of cream of mushroom soup to the meat and butter. then add the milk and blend it all together making a cream sauce. Add the vegetables, blend it all together and serve over rice. Use milk to the consistency you like.

1/4 c. margarine
3/4 c. chopped celery
3/4 c. chopped onion
6 c. water
3/4 c. lentils

Saute in large stewing pan margarine, celery, and onion. Add water and lentils. Cook 20 minutes. Add: 1 qt. tomatoes
1/2 tsp. garlic salt
2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
3/4 c. barley or brown rice
1/2 tsp. rosemary

Simmer 45-60 minutes. Add 1/2 cup shredded carrots. Cook 5 minutes more. Serves 6.

1 lb. (8 links) fully cooked bratwurst
or knackwurst* cut into 1/2 inch pieces
2 med. (2 c.) potatoes, peeled and
chopped
1 med. (1/2 c.) onion, chopped
1 sm. (4 c.) cabbage, shredded
3 c. milk
3 tbsp. all purpose flour
1 c. (4 oz.) Swiss cheese, shredded
Snipped parsley

In a Dutch oven, combine sausage, potatoes, onion, 1 1/2 teaspoons of salt and a dash of pepper. Add 2 cups of water. Bring to boiling and reduce heat. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes or until potatoes are nearly tender. Stir in cabbage. Cook 10 minutes more or until vegetables are tender. Stir in 2 1/2 cups of the milk. Stir remaining milk into flour and stir into soup. Cook (on low heat as this dish will scorch easily) and stir until thickened and bubbly. Stir in cheese until melted. Garnish with parsley. Makes 6 servings. *Polish sausage may also be used